This is the part of summer that.drags.on.and.on.
It's 100 degrees every day. The other day it was like 89 and every one was like oh wow, it's so cool. We are all sweating all.the.time. My vagina is fine but I can't help but worry about everyone else's.
Being at the pool and baseball games has lost it's excitement. Basically because it is so hot you will straight up burst into flames if you are outside for more than 20 minutes. I'm not excited about popsicles or iced coffee anymore. Nothing new is on television except for Breaking Bad (thank you Walter White). Boulevard Zon and Summer Shandy have worn me thin with their sweet lemony-ness. Nobody has anything to say to me except "Wow it's so hot out!" Occasionally someone will mention that we haven't seen rain in weeks. It's too hot for pasta or soup or to cook anything indoors. Everything exciting and good about summer has faded like the last light of a fourth of July firework.
Everyone's murmuring about, do we dare say, fall. It'll come sweet things and in November I'll be writing a post about how we're tired of...no, no wait, I won't because Fireside Nut Brown is the best beer and everyone loves 50-70 degree weather and leaves changing and Halloween/Thanksgiving and football sundays and new television shows and.and.and. So hang in there sweet things, it'll be Labor Day soon and six months from now you'll be wishing it was mid July.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
A manifesto
Let yourself be gutted. Let it open you. Start there.
Decide what is you and mainline it. Embrace the decisions that truly make you feel like you. Embrace yourself. You are magnificent and wonderful and never stop knowing that. More importantly never stop being addicted to doing whatever it is you want to do. Lose the guilt. If you want it, then that's that and move on. You are a grown ass woman, eat the cupcake if you want and then be done with it.
Gratitude, sweet pea, gratitude. Be grateful for all of it. For this moment, now matter how big or small. Be grateful that life beat you into submission because that's how you learn to fight with compassion instead of fury. You are not broken, you are bendable, and you can survive anything. Damaged goods are the best kind there are.
Stop. Just stop. Take a deep breathe. Read a book. Take a bath. Have a glass of wine. Call your mother. Laugh so hard it hurts. Spend extra money for good cheese. Dance, for the love of god, just dance, anywhere and everywhere. Spoon. Don't rush through the moments when you should have been paying attention. Say thank you. Say no. No is the kind of power the good witch wields.
Ask for help. It's ok to not be ok. That crazed fire is normal and you aren't crazy. You are the best kind of fucked up. The serpent was the best thing that ever happened to Eve. Make better mistakes tomorrow.
Be brave enough to break your own heart. Leave the bad relationship, bad job, bad habits. The only way out of a hole is to climb out. You are the deciding factor in this equation. Be true blue. Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you’ll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you’ll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.
When there's nothing left to burn you have to set yourself on fire. Don't be afraid to give yourself everything you've ever wanted in life. In this life. Take responsibility for the energy you bring you into this space. Be curious. Ask better questions. Say fuck yes to intimacy and truth. Love with abandon. Your heart is resilient. Above all be kind.
Decide what is you and mainline it. Embrace the decisions that truly make you feel like you. Embrace yourself. You are magnificent and wonderful and never stop knowing that. More importantly never stop being addicted to doing whatever it is you want to do. Lose the guilt. If you want it, then that's that and move on. You are a grown ass woman, eat the cupcake if you want and then be done with it.
Gratitude, sweet pea, gratitude. Be grateful for all of it. For this moment, now matter how big or small. Be grateful that life beat you into submission because that's how you learn to fight with compassion instead of fury. You are not broken, you are bendable, and you can survive anything. Damaged goods are the best kind there are.
Stop. Just stop. Take a deep breathe. Read a book. Take a bath. Have a glass of wine. Call your mother. Laugh so hard it hurts. Spend extra money for good cheese. Dance, for the love of god, just dance, anywhere and everywhere. Spoon. Don't rush through the moments when you should have been paying attention. Say thank you. Say no. No is the kind of power the good witch wields.
Ask for help. It's ok to not be ok. That crazed fire is normal and you aren't crazy. You are the best kind of fucked up. The serpent was the best thing that ever happened to Eve. Make better mistakes tomorrow.
Be brave enough to break your own heart. Leave the bad relationship, bad job, bad habits. The only way out of a hole is to climb out. You are the deciding factor in this equation. Be true blue. Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you’ll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you’ll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.
When there's nothing left to burn you have to set yourself on fire. Don't be afraid to give yourself everything you've ever wanted in life. In this life. Take responsibility for the energy you bring you into this space. Be curious. Ask better questions. Say fuck yes to intimacy and truth. Love with abandon. Your heart is resilient. Above all be kind.
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