I want to tell you about my weekend, reader. I doubt you care much, or at all. I hope you do, at least a little. Sometimes I'm not sure if you're even there at all. Never the less...
On Thursday, J and I went to get Italian Nachos and beer for dinner. Because we are adults but not grown up. Have you ever had Italian Nachos? They are fantastic. Like an explosion of cheesy gooey goodness in your mouth. We watched The League, It's Always Sunny, & Thursday Night Football.
Friday we had dinner with my mom and her boyfriend. I find it weird to say "my mom's boyfriend" but I like him and he is a good guy and makes her very happy. My mom likes J for the same reasons. After dinner we went to a haunted house with J's coworkers. We stood in a field drinking a beer and whiskey from a flask saying we couldn't feel our feet because it was just so cold before running through a maze terrified. We went home and drank pumpkin spice lattes with pumpkin vodka and watched Shark Tank for awhile. I couldn't get warm again and got so tired and fell asleep softly.
On Saturday we dressed in our Halloween costumes and went to his friends annual Halloween party. I dressed as a slutty replacement ref and he dressed as a lumber jack/axe murderer. We drank wine by a bonfire and laughed and talked and met new people. I wore my hair in pigtails and I still haven't taken them out.
Today we went to the grocery store. He made chili and I made jalapeno popper dip. We watched football all day. We checked our fantasy football scores and saw we were both winning. I came home to my cat, Riggins. I took a bath, drank some white wine, and now am getting ready to watch The Walking Dead.
I have tomorrow off work.
This weekend may sound oh so boring to you, reader, but it was so beautiful though. This weekend I was happy. Very happy. I felt alive and loved and at peace. And that's what I'll remember most about this weekend.
Showing posts with label wine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wine. Show all posts
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
#Reverb11 5
The Fifth Prompt: Describe 5 guilty pleasures aka 5 things I love that you probably don't or I probably shouldn't.
1) Leggings as pants. I know, I know. The horror. And the terribleness. But do you fucking know how comfortable I am as I sit there in my boots and side pony tail (see runners up) during the day? It's seriously amazing and I am going to keep on doing in 2012. And I don't care what you think they make my ass look like. In fact, you should probably buy me more tops I can wear over my leggings for Christmas. K, thanx.
2) Mr Riggins, my cat. He is named after either Tim Riggins (FNL) or John Riggins (Redskins), whichever makes you think I'm cooler. He is an asshole. And really fat. But wow, he's great at cuddling and making me feel awesome.
3) Fantasy football/The League. "Hey, man, you all just back off, all of you. I've worked really hard this year to put together an amazing team. I have studied the waiver wire; I know all the sleepers; I have done the bye-week plug-ins—I have done it all. And all I want to do is watch the game and find out how my team does."
4) Boxed wine. Oh yeah, boxowine. In the tub, on the couch, in a cup, by the pool, in the car, during all the TV shows, during the holidays (all of them), & uh pretty much any other time I want to be unclassy and drunk.
5) The Town. I have watched this movie two dozen or so times since January and it doesn't get old. "I just want you to know it's going to be me who tells you to fuck yourself."
Runners up: bacon and side ponytails.
1) Leggings as pants. I know, I know. The horror. And the terribleness. But do you fucking know how comfortable I am as I sit there in my boots and side pony tail (see runners up) during the day? It's seriously amazing and I am going to keep on doing in 2012. And I don't care what you think they make my ass look like. In fact, you should probably buy me more tops I can wear over my leggings for Christmas. K, thanx.
2) Mr Riggins, my cat. He is named after either Tim Riggins (FNL) or John Riggins (Redskins), whichever makes you think I'm cooler. He is an asshole. And really fat. But wow, he's great at cuddling and making me feel awesome.
3) Fantasy football/The League. "Hey, man, you all just back off, all of you. I've worked really hard this year to put together an amazing team. I have studied the waiver wire; I know all the sleepers; I have done the bye-week plug-ins—I have done it all. And all I want to do is watch the game and find out how my team does."
4) Boxed wine. Oh yeah, boxowine. In the tub, on the couch, in a cup, by the pool, in the car, during all the TV shows, during the holidays (all of them), & uh pretty much any other time I want to be unclassy and drunk.
5) The Town. I have watched this movie two dozen or so times since January and it doesn't get old. "I just want you to know it's going to be me who tells you to fuck yourself."
Runners up: bacon and side ponytails.
Monday, June 13, 2011
America: The Story of Us & Booze: The Story of What I Drank While Watching Part Three
Episode Ten: World War Two
Pearl Harbor. Not the movie with Ben Affleck & Josh Hartnett (Wasn't Kate so lucky?) But in real life we are all "Fuck the Japanese!" Except here it's not funny. Because it's closer to home. Pearl Harbor hit hard. And D-Day happened. Women were awesome and worked hard. Shit wasn't easy. And there aren't really any jokes to make. My mom took me to see Saving Private Ryan when I was 10. My mom made me close my eyes for the first 10 minutes. Oh also, I'm drinking Riesling.
Atomic Bomb.
The Japanese surrender. Do you think in Japan they have movies like "Hiroshima" that involve asian Ben Affleck and a love triangle? It's an interesting thought. This show skips right over any ethical dilemma about dropping BOTH bombs and moves right on into us celebrating and the war ending with us making more money and of course, the baby boom. Sure we became a superpower, but at what cost?
Sunday, June 12, 2011
America: The Story of Us & Booze: The Story of What I Drank While Watching (Part Dos)
We're still going on this nonsense journey.
Episode Eight: Boom
America finds oil. And we all know, oil=awesomeoness=$$$. America basically gets rich and wants to party. Just like I'm finishing up a glass of vodka & diet dr pepper. Henry Ford makes some cars. People yell "woah!" instead of mother fucking braking, thus inventing the car accident, and making my current life both possible & shitty. Thanks H.F., this one is for you (finish vodka, pour Riesling)! People now have money & time, so what are they going to do? Drink. But America says fuck that. Prohibition time. Drinking is not ok. People say fuck that, I'll hide it in my car. This is the same logic I applied when I was in high school. I got an MIP. People in the 20's got arrested. But people back then were more bad ass about it. They got guns and started shooting shit up. The goverment solidified its place as worthless because because people are getting shot up in the streets and they can't do anything but investigate tax invasion. It's like now when people are murderers but all they do is search for people not wearing seatbelts. Anyway, insert shit on Al Capone here. I want to be like "America, listen up, shit's about to get real up in here for the next 20 some years so you should probably have a keg party right about now." At least they repealed prohibition. As Bill Maher says, "People NEED a drink."
Right about here I got pissed we didn't talk about Titanic but in reality, it makes sense. I mean, that boat didn't make it to America. (You can take an extra drink here for Jack).
Episode Nine: Bust
I fucking told you shit's about to get real. Let's get another glass of wine for this one. We've got Tom motherfucking Brokaw talking about savings. The Bank=Mr. Potter in "It's a Wonderful Life." The Hoover Dam is brilliant apparently. I've never seen it. Tom Brokaw says the damn is the shit. I say "I miss Peter Jennings." Las Vegas becomes awesome. At this point, I'm kind of concerned about America as a whole. Basically the past 50 years all we've had to talk about is partying. Not that it's a bad thing, but when we want to talk about why we have crazy troubles, I want us to remember this. 1934=The environment goes to shit=awesome CGI. But basically, this means we are fucked. Then hints of news internationally "will change America forever." We say fuck that shit and build Mt. Rushmore. Tom Brokaw says it's a statment. I say pour me another glass of wine because we've got a triple crisis happening and we are ignoring all of it. In case you aren't paying attention, we've got depression, dust, & potential war. FYI: In 30,000 years Mt. Rushmore will be just rocks due to weathering.
I'm like wtf, what about World War I? But oh yeah, we weren't even in that War. We were partying.
Rev. Al Sharpton thinks we are missing the most important event of the depression decade. He says it's Joe Louis vs. Schmeling. It's confusing because at this point in history America doesn't give black people any rights and they hate Germany so I don't know, but we are still like "Fuck yeah! Beat his face!"
Episode Eight: Boom
America finds oil. And we all know, oil=awesomeoness=$$$. America basically gets rich and wants to party. Just like I'm finishing up a glass of vodka & diet dr pepper. Henry Ford makes some cars. People yell "woah!" instead of mother fucking braking, thus inventing the car accident, and making my current life both possible & shitty. Thanks H.F., this one is for you (finish vodka, pour Riesling)! People now have money & time, so what are they going to do? Drink. But America says fuck that. Prohibition time. Drinking is not ok. People say fuck that, I'll hide it in my car. This is the same logic I applied when I was in high school. I got an MIP. People in the 20's got arrested. But people back then were more bad ass about it. They got guns and started shooting shit up. The goverment solidified its place as worthless because because people are getting shot up in the streets and they can't do anything but investigate tax invasion. It's like now when people are murderers but all they do is search for people not wearing seatbelts. Anyway, insert shit on Al Capone here. I want to be like "America, listen up, shit's about to get real up in here for the next 20 some years so you should probably have a keg party right about now." At least they repealed prohibition. As Bill Maher says, "People NEED a drink."
Right about here I got pissed we didn't talk about Titanic but in reality, it makes sense. I mean, that boat didn't make it to America. (You can take an extra drink here for Jack).
Episode Nine: Bust
I fucking told you shit's about to get real. Let's get another glass of wine for this one. We've got Tom motherfucking Brokaw talking about savings. The Bank=Mr. Potter in "It's a Wonderful Life." The Hoover Dam is brilliant apparently. I've never seen it. Tom Brokaw says the damn is the shit. I say "I miss Peter Jennings." Las Vegas becomes awesome. At this point, I'm kind of concerned about America as a whole. Basically the past 50 years all we've had to talk about is partying. Not that it's a bad thing, but when we want to talk about why we have crazy troubles, I want us to remember this. 1934=The environment goes to shit=awesome CGI. But basically, this means we are fucked. Then hints of news internationally "will change America forever." We say fuck that shit and build Mt. Rushmore. Tom Brokaw says it's a statment. I say pour me another glass of wine because we've got a triple crisis happening and we are ignoring all of it. In case you aren't paying attention, we've got depression, dust, & potential war. FYI: In 30,000 years Mt. Rushmore will be just rocks due to weathering.
I'm like wtf, what about World War I? But oh yeah, we weren't even in that War. We were partying.
Rev. Al Sharpton thinks we are missing the most important event of the depression decade. He says it's Joe Louis vs. Schmeling. It's confusing because at this point in history America doesn't give black people any rights and they hate Germany so I don't know, but we are still like "Fuck yeah! Beat his face!"
America: The Story of Us & Booze: The Story of What I Drank While Watching
I decided to watch America: The Story of Us on Netflix Instant while drinking. Carling, who you can follow at @xCarling, suggested I blog about it. We always have the best ideas.
(please note that I did not watch all these episodes back to back, nor did I die of alcohol poisoning)
Episode One: Rebels
I'm immediately engrossed. Awesome computer graphics, mentions of Pocahontas, and I'm a couple glasses of Shiraz in. Also we find the deep seeded roots of America fucking over other ethnicities for profit. But more so, there's the thinking that that's patriotic. So I'm all "Fuck yeah, grow that tobacco wherever you want! Fuck those people who owned this land first! Also, more Shiraz!"
Episode Two: Revolution
Taxes? Being bossy? Eh, we're over it. "Fuck England! Fuck taxes! Fuck this tea! More Shiraz!" Also, George Washington is a baller. He totally rocks out Valley Forge in the winter. Did you know he basically started mainstreaming vaccinations but in a totally gross way that involves chopping off someone's smallpox and rubbing it in your battle wound? Gross, but genius. This is how he won. I mean, he won because he's a genius, not because he's gross. He also wore cool hats.
Episode Three: Westward
Oregon Trail. Sorry you are about to lose the next like 15 hours of your life playing that game. But it's basically this. Also, this cute little husband and wife had a baby in a wagon. But then the next day 5 feet of snow fell and the husband had to eat the baby and wife. They don't have that option on the game. Also gold & The Alamo. And Shiraz.
Episode Four: Division
Did you know slavery was on the decline in the south before the cotton gin? After the cotton gin the south become Gone With the Wind (part 1). Abe Lincoln kept a file in his desk called "Assasination" before he was even elected. Also whales played a huge role in our country. The same way Shiraz is playing a role in my life.
Episode Five: Civil War
You know this one. North vs. South. Turns out Abe Lincoln knows how to be a baller and use the railroad. Lots of blood & death. Also a lot of opportunity to say phrases like "a country divided" and "brother against brother." Abe & the north win out. Sheryl Crow calls this "a dark spot in our history." Clearly, nobody was soaking up the sun here. Think of this as Gone With the Wind part 2. Also I'm drinking Riesling now.
Episode Six: Heartland
As soon as the title comes up, I push pause and play George Strait's "Heartland." I pour another glass of Riesling. I finish it while singing to my cat "Sing a song about the heartland, sing a song about my life." Then I pour a glass of vodka and sit the fuck down. This is basically Little House on the Prairie. There was a scary tornado scene & a lot of bison. Also, sod houses. (We also glaze over the fact that at this point we are totally fucking over the Native Americans. We're getting less excited about fucking other people over. It's just not PC. See also Custer's Last Stand.)
At this point we've got some common themes. The narrator enjoys saying things about change such as "America was changed forever" and "This changed everything."
Episode Seven: Cities
People realize the country kind of sucks. You know, with the Native Americans & having to do everything themselves. So they decided to fuck the Heartland, build some tall ass buildings, and find ways to get Chinese food at 3 am. (Just kidding about the last part, that's later.) Anyway, they build some tall buildings and then of course decide to be criminals. This is how mug shots got invented. Also there was a bitching fire in which a bunch of people died. I went to get more vodka & popcorn and when I came back some guys in white suits were sweeping shit off the streets. They said stuff got sanitary. Also, it took 25 years for the Statue of Liberty to turn green. That's an awesome fact. You are welcome.
I think we are missing some big times here. When did stuff like phones & electricity happen? We're sort of skimming over some big events for the sake of minor stuff like bad weather & sod houses. But whatevs, I didn't make America.
Who wants another glass?
(please note that I did not watch all these episodes back to back, nor did I die of alcohol poisoning)
Episode One: Rebels
I'm immediately engrossed. Awesome computer graphics, mentions of Pocahontas, and I'm a couple glasses of Shiraz in. Also we find the deep seeded roots of America fucking over other ethnicities for profit. But more so, there's the thinking that that's patriotic. So I'm all "Fuck yeah, grow that tobacco wherever you want! Fuck those people who owned this land first! Also, more Shiraz!"
Episode Two: Revolution
Taxes? Being bossy? Eh, we're over it. "Fuck England! Fuck taxes! Fuck this tea! More Shiraz!" Also, George Washington is a baller. He totally rocks out Valley Forge in the winter. Did you know he basically started mainstreaming vaccinations but in a totally gross way that involves chopping off someone's smallpox and rubbing it in your battle wound? Gross, but genius. This is how he won. I mean, he won because he's a genius, not because he's gross. He also wore cool hats.
Episode Three: Westward
Oregon Trail. Sorry you are about to lose the next like 15 hours of your life playing that game. But it's basically this. Also, this cute little husband and wife had a baby in a wagon. But then the next day 5 feet of snow fell and the husband had to eat the baby and wife. They don't have that option on the game. Also gold & The Alamo. And Shiraz.
Episode Four: Division
Did you know slavery was on the decline in the south before the cotton gin? After the cotton gin the south become Gone With the Wind (part 1). Abe Lincoln kept a file in his desk called "Assasination" before he was even elected. Also whales played a huge role in our country. The same way Shiraz is playing a role in my life.
Episode Five: Civil War
You know this one. North vs. South. Turns out Abe Lincoln knows how to be a baller and use the railroad. Lots of blood & death. Also a lot of opportunity to say phrases like "a country divided" and "brother against brother." Abe & the north win out. Sheryl Crow calls this "a dark spot in our history." Clearly, nobody was soaking up the sun here. Think of this as Gone With the Wind part 2. Also I'm drinking Riesling now.
Episode Six: Heartland
As soon as the title comes up, I push pause and play George Strait's "Heartland." I pour another glass of Riesling. I finish it while singing to my cat "Sing a song about the heartland, sing a song about my life." Then I pour a glass of vodka and sit the fuck down. This is basically Little House on the Prairie. There was a scary tornado scene & a lot of bison. Also, sod houses. (We also glaze over the fact that at this point we are totally fucking over the Native Americans. We're getting less excited about fucking other people over. It's just not PC. See also Custer's Last Stand.)
At this point we've got some common themes. The narrator enjoys saying things about change such as "America was changed forever" and "This changed everything."
Episode Seven: Cities
People realize the country kind of sucks. You know, with the Native Americans & having to do everything themselves. So they decided to fuck the Heartland, build some tall ass buildings, and find ways to get Chinese food at 3 am. (Just kidding about the last part, that's later.) Anyway, they build some tall buildings and then of course decide to be criminals. This is how mug shots got invented. Also there was a bitching fire in which a bunch of people died. I went to get more vodka & popcorn and when I came back some guys in white suits were sweeping shit off the streets. They said stuff got sanitary. Also, it took 25 years for the Statue of Liberty to turn green. That's an awesome fact. You are welcome.
I think we are missing some big times here. When did stuff like phones & electricity happen? We're sort of skimming over some big events for the sake of minor stuff like bad weather & sod houses. But whatevs, I didn't make America.
Who wants another glass?
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